Reality Check #1

The largest myth out there is that parents who have children are unselfish. It is the biggest lie since Hitler's notion about the Aryan race.

Parents have children to fulfill all of those dreams that they were not able to fulfill. Great are their expectations. Woe to those that do not live up to them. Woe still to those who have a sibling that does.

Observe the case of Betty Cooper.

The youngest of three kids born to lower middle class circumstances. Betty is pretty and smart and understanding. She does pretty well in school and doesn't worry her parents at all. At least in the traditional ways that teens do. Betty committed two sins. Her first sin in life was to be born after her brother Charles (know as Chick in high school because he was small and because he hated to be called Chuck). Chick placed first in everything he ever did through equal parts work (not always hard) and luck in both high school and college. Riverdale's valedictorian went to Harvard and then slid into Business School. He then went to Columbia and passed the bar. First place of course. He now works as a corporate lawyer with an eye towards public office. He of course got married to a nice girl who majored in library science and taught school for a bit from Indianapolis and has the two kids, two cars and a dog in a place that can only be described as "pleasant valley Sunday."
Betty's second sin was to be born after her sister Polly. Polly was not as lucky as Chick was in that she earned every "A" that she got the old fashioned way-by studying. However, she did distinguish herself at both the school newspaper and in the school government. She served all four years as class president-one more term than her brother. She was also president of the local student arm of the Kiwanis. More people read the school paper during her tenure than had ever before or since. As co-Valedictorian of her class, she entered Stanford then came back to New York for a master's in journalism at Columbia. She became a newscasterlocally and then got sent back out to California, San Francisco that is and is currently the senior correspondent for the local station there. She is still single but much admired. She received the George Peabody award along with her colleagues for some piece that they did on California's immigration laws.
Betty's parents thought that three had to be the ultimate charm. After all her brother and sister transcended their plebian roots to become superstars. They did it without special tutoring or anything of the fancy things that people spend money they did not have on.
Betty apparently did not understand the plan. She did not skip two grades as Chick had. She pursues things the way Polly did, by hard work. However, unlike Polly who knew that she was going to be a journalist and had a plan and worked the plan, Betty did well in elementary-nothing outstanding and her high school career while good has not been outstanding. She does work for the school newspaper but unlike her sister, she has not shaped the readership or made it a "must read." She is a cheerleader like her sister was but again, servicable. She looks good and all but there are others that are more talented and definitely better looking. She does commmunity service of course and she is a good person throughout. She does plan to go to college. She is not quite sure of what she wants to major in. Her parents have driven home the fact that she will have to earn a scholarship to wherever she will attend. Discussion of anything that Betty does usually segues into a discussion of her siblings. If it does not immediately, then she hears the dreaded, "that's nice dear," which means that if she wanted to, she could have been a superstar or rather it's too bad that the luck ran out when it got to her.


Observe next the case of Valerie Smith.

Valerie's family was the second Black family to move into Riverdale. The Claytons beat them by a good 10 years. Valerie's father is an architect. Her mother works full time at the local bank as a loan officer. Both came from humble backgrounds from the South, that nebulous place often spoken of by Blacks of a certain with equal parts noistaligia and equal parts fear. No place up north can ever compare to the community that Blacks experienced down south but then, discussion of life in the south is usually edited. Valerie and her sister Nancy were born in New York City. The first years of their lives were not easy but not exactly as on Good Times. They moved to Midvale when Valerie was 12. They were the first Black family in Midvale, which while the neighbors did not burn crosses in their yard, many did not welcome them with open arms. The parents of Josie, Melody, Pepper and eventually Soc were the first to welcome their family. Both girls always finished at the head of the class after having been programmed that as Black girls 100% would never be enough. Their father would always remind them of the time that their car was pulled over as they were entering Midvale because the car that they were in was too nice for a Black man to have. He also reminded them of parent-teacher conferences where it was recommended that they not expect so much of the girls because after all, some children weren't meant to go to college.
Their move to Riverdale came about when Midvale realized that it could not justify keeping a high school open with an ever dwindling population of students. It made more sense to move the senior students to Riverdale and close the high school. So it came to pass. Valerie and Nancy were sent to Riverdale High along with their friends. Chuck Clayton and his family had broken considerable ground in Riverdale. The reception was a little warmer. Warm enough that both girls did not have worry about acceptance and their mother was invited to PTA activities and that their father let his guard down but a little.
While in Midvale, Valerie learned to play music. Not just classical but rock music. During their freshman year of high school, Josie James formed a band. Melody was included as a drummer (who knew that the brainless wonder could keep rhythm). Alex Cabot, who decided that he would be their manager and knowing that his sister had no talent, heard Valerie singing in front of a group of friends. In one of the best moves of his young life, he reacquainted Valerie, Josie and Melody. A group was born. However, unlike Josie and Melody, Valerie at first kept the band a secret from her parents. She then told her parents but promised that it would not get in the way of her going to college to become an engineer. She also promised not to play the music anywhere in the house since rock, punk and grunge is considered "white".
So Valerie multitasks between being a college-bound student and a musician. She tells herself that once she turns 18, she can pursue the music thing free from the watchful eyes of her parents.